ART & LIFESTYLE

LAMENTATION AS AN ENEMY OF SELF-ESTEEM

Psicorubrica by Lara Ventisette,,it,"The newest computer in the world can only get worse,,it,thanks to its speed,,it,the most ancient problem in relations between human beings,,it,that of communication,,it,Who must communicate,,it,he will always find himself confronted with the usual problem,,it,what to say and how to say it ",,it,Bill Gates,,en,To communicate who we are in an effective way, it can be useful to know how human beings communicate in general,,it,Communication is a fascinating and complex world,,it

A strong belief in our society suggests socializing our difficulties and problems with the people we care about, in order to "let off steam" and reduce excess pain, fear or anger that torments us. Like any belief handed down, this too has become widespread and widely practiced: it will all have happened to you, at least once, to "throw up" your malaise on a friend and / or family member, and I'm ready to bet that even more often it happened that other people involved you in their complaints concerning the most disparate topics between work, family, relazioni, generalized guilt or dissatisfaction. Even, it may happen that we find ourselves in situations in which perfect strangers pay homage to useless ramblings, causing us great embarrassment and displeasure, for the inability to help them (why I don't always declare my profession to strangers!).

Ma, beyond the context in which the complaint occurs and beyond the degree of intimacy that we can boast with the "complainant", know that it is a communicative-relational mode dangerous from different points of view.

First of all, more often we socialize our difficulties and moods, the more we will have an enlarged perception of it; secondly, the greater the opportunities to "vent" the more confused we will be compared to the disturbing situation and the less likely we will feel understood and supported in a useful way by others; infine, "verbal hemorrhage" will make the physiological process of emotional metabolism very difficult to recognize, understand, manage and externalize emotions in a functional and appropriate way to different situations and interlocutors.

In summary, talking too much about what affects us, and with too many people, it risks making us feel even more afflicted and insecure because we are incapable of "getting by on our own" and endeavoring to unleash resources and strategies suitable for facing the difficulty or problem. Avoiding to face firsthand the challenges that life offers us means provoking a setback in improving self-esteem, that is to sit in the middle of the path to become the best version of ourselves.